Cruel Affection
by MoonMyst
Summary: Something happened that night – something horrific. As Relena recollects, she must decide whether she is willing to pay the ultimate price because of it. (RelenaHeero)
1. Chapter One

**Cruel Affections **

**By: M o o n M y s t **

**Start 11.11.03 **

**A/N - ** the _flashbacks _are in intalics and they skip around the times before events in regular font, which go in order. Thanx a million for reading! Enjoy!

Disclaimer- I own nothing. Please do not insinuate that I think I own Gundam Wing, because, though I would love to live in my own demented imagination, I don't, and therefore, must repeat, that I do NOT own GW. This applies to all chapters.

Relena cried out in both fright and horror - shrill screams bringing her to the attention of the people around her. Pure exasperation filled the young woman's heart - her soul crying out in vain, pleading her cause to her stubborn mind. Things were never supposed to be this way - so how could this have happened?

A soothing whisper was issued from the gentle mouth of Milliardo Peacecraft in a futile attempt to soothe his sister's aching heart. Her shrieking continued, only louder this time - its audible madness reverberating throughout the lonely halls of the mansion. 

He gripped her arm firmly, but she only flung it away, forsaking any comfort.

By that time the usual hustle and bustle of a large workspace had ceased - the world seemed void of sound, except the ever-present cries of the former queen. Some stared, others seemed occupied with their shoes - but most looked on in pity, for the story of such loss was known to the entire population of the Earth's Sphere, their own hearts aching in the pain that their beloved pacifist felt.

~*~

_A quiet man stood - his back against a concrete wall while his mind seemed engaged in the curves of the ceiling above him. He was young, no older than seventeen winters, but his face had a genuine expression of understanding that could only come from that of an encounter with pain. Though it was rare for any such person to survive a head-on collision with death and devastation - no matter how impossible that may seem, Heero always seemed to endure the harsh battle for his life. _

_He appeared to be in a slight daze, but in fact his brain was waiting - ready for the individual that was supposed to appear at any moment, _though with humans you can never be sure - such unpredictable creatures we are_. Perhaps, that was what made them so very interesting. _

_"Hello." _

_The words were somehow hushed, maybe tired, but they definitely had a certain sensuality to them - a quiet teasing sort of sound. _

_Heero Yuy looked from his spot on the ceiling to the young blonde in front of him, her idle grace carrying her towards him. A dress of pale pink draped elegantly upon her slim body, swayed into the movements of the winter wind. _

_The solicitous smile that adorned her slender face, its tantalizing stoniness sending warning signals throughout his body - this certainly wasn't the Relena Peacecraft he had come to know over the few long years of war. But hadn't he just thought of how unpredictable people were? Why couldn't she try her hand at it sometime - and why couldn't he? _

_But he knew the answer to his own question before he had even considered it. His life was a mold he filled perfectly - any outside disturbance had to be eliminated from the first moment of disruption - only now this girl was a part of the mold - no matter how he longed to destroy her. By destroying her, he would ultimately destroy himself. _

_"What do you want?" he asked, his own coldness escaping through way of words. He didn't like the way she looked at him - it almost scared him. _

_"Oh, nothing." _

_His eyebrows arched considerately, for there was never a time when Relena wanted nothing - she always had to have something - or someone. _

**~*~**

Now, the blonde young woman sat, her usual composure lost in the agony of her broken life. For he was gone. How had it ended this way? How had it started? How had such horrible atrocities gone on without notice?

For the first time, Relena Peacecraft looked up from her dependably dull spot on the off-white walls that so sickeningly enclosed her. She let out a faint moan, its wistful need bringing her more into the entrancing reverie she had imagined for herself. 

He was here - no one else knew - no one else could know. But he was alive, and well, too. Soon they would run off together, leave their ancient lifestyles behind for freedom. Then he would reveal his true love for her. Because he loved her - and so sincerely that he had told her so in her last encounter with him. _He loves me._

**~*~**

_A glass of golden liquid sat calmly upon the tray, an array of untouched delicacies were next to the champagne, but instead of her usual need for food, Relena craved alcohol. Slight smudges of rose lipstick evident upon the crystal wineglass, a few drops lay ubiquitously about the tray, these the only signs that Relena Peacecraft could possibly have ingested such a forbidden substance. The young woman cocked her head to the side flirtatiously, at the moment a rush of blood flooding into her head - the alcohol distorting her consciousness, but without much reluctance on her part._

_She lifted her glass in the direction of an unseen person, her pale hand flinging the remaining liquid down her throat, it's smooth taste cascading down her throat in such a manner that she began to cough, spurts of the fluid spray from her perfect rosy lips. A few hacks later and she smiled - as if she had passed some sort of ultimate test, being able to hold down the mind-altering substance was quite an enormous feat in her mind. _

_"Have a drink with me." _

_Heero stared up at her - he'd been told to watch her, not baby-sit. Relena was a full-grown woman; she could do whatever the hell she wanted, as long as it didn't involve her in the hospital or on the front page of a newspaper with some sort of conspiracy behind it. _

_"No." he stated curtly, aware that his discourteous comment made the former queen's face fall. He had never liked to disappoint her, but she was acting strange - different. He wasn't quite sure if he liked her this way, though, he wasn't quite sure he liked her the other way either. _

_It was quite clear in his mind how to label Relena - she was an extremist. She was an absolute pacifist and a polite young woman. However, tonight she was the opposite - an undeniable violence heating in her blood as she looked intensely at him, trying ever so relentlessly to figure out his secrets. _

_"Why not?" she asked suddenly, breaking the alienated silence between the two. _

_But, instead of answering her question, Heero looked back down at his book. It wasn't all that interesting, but still a useful tool if he were ever to be caught on a foreign land mass with only a gun and a piece of rope. Who knows? It could happen. _

_"They all hate me!" she cried spontaneously, tears streaming down her face as her features contorted into a miserable frown. Her brow furrowed as she leaned into her hands, letting the feel of cool moisture slide down her cheeks and hands. After several moments, Relena peeked through her hands, hoping to see some sign of emotion from the soldier. But she was sorely disappointed, for Heero sat upon the same chair, in the same position, with the same book. This time she burst into real tears, seeing that he took no notice of her, shattering into oblivion her heart - maybe even her mind. _


	2. Chapter Two

**Cruel Affection**

**Chapter Two **

**A/N- **_flashabacks _in italics, and please excuse my incessant misuse of the lovely punctuation marks called comma and hyphen. Thanx a billion for reading! Enjoy!****

Zechs thought, head in hands. As he sat silently, he contemplated over what had happened the last days.  He sighed, a steady fear rising in his strong body.  Had this all happened in one instant or was there possibly more to the story? Relena's half-hearted excuses of late, had left him with an empty, unsure feeling.  He wasn't convinced of anything lately, what with all that had happened, even his trust in once beloved friends was steadily decreasing with every day -- what was he going to do?

A soft rapping upon the door alerted the eldest Peaceraft to the presence of another being in the room.  He glimpsed up enough to see platinum black hair enter the room after waiting for some sort of reply that never came.

"Zechs?" Noin asked, a worried expression radiating some sort of unidentifiable confidence upon him.  She looked tired and concerned, but somehow her being there was like a beacon of hope -- a steady light to help him.  He looked up into her deep eyes as an acknowledging of her presence.  

"She's woken up.  The doctors tried to give her another sedative, but it's not working -- her body rips through whatever dosage we give her.  I don't know what to do."

Milliardo sighed again; this time his hands moving to his temples to firmly massage them.  What else was there left to do? He had put off this day with tranquilizers and promises, but it had crept up on him slowly.  He had wondered how long it would take her to resist the medication; maybe he had underestimated the power of love.

"I'll be in to see her in a minute."

Lucrezia bent her legs so that she was at the same height as the sitting figure she called her dearest friend.  "If you want me to come in, too, I will." She started quietly, a troubled look in her dark eyes, "You're not alone, you know, I'm here for you."

He looked at her tired features, his own uneasy orbs of blue scanning his companion's face, "No, I should tell her myself." He said, smiling weakly -- she didn't have to be here or do this; she could be doing whatever she pleased.  But for some reason, or rather sheer dedication, she had stayed with him all this time, abandoning her own needs, and solely concentrating on him.

"Alright." Said Noin, a sympathetic smile finally brightening her fair face.  She stepped out of the dark room, her indigo eyes snatching a last glance in the direction of her love.  _If only this hadn't happened - I hate to see him suffer._

Zechs let out a deep breath, eyes roaming to the door that he would need to exit by to see Relena.  A new confidence stirred within him, though, and he stood stoically, realizing that he had to - no matter what.  He had to let her know the truth.

**~*~**

_"You should go to bed." He suggested, though his tone was anything but accommodating.  Bold brown hair stuck up in the most irritating way, and his Prussian eyes gazed listlessly in her direction.  Today had been one of her good days - one full of tranquility and happiness.  This was one of the days that the entire Earth Sphere thought was the regularly prefect life for their queen of peace, that was everyone but Heero._

_He knew the real princess -- how she really was.  It didn't take a genius to discover what Relena's life was really like, however it did take a mastermind to cover up all that truly went on._

_"Okay." She said, hushed footsteps walked to the door and then silently closed it behind them.  Heero looked up, hoping that she had done as he requested, and then maybe tomorrow would be just as good as today -- a day he had actually enjoyed on some level._

_A sharp cry issued from the adjacent room -- Relena's room.  His soldier's sense kicking into gear, Heero rushed into the room unchallenged, eyes searching the near vacant space for any sign of foreign assailant.  Only, there was none._

_The blonde woman stood, tears streaming down her lovely face.  Yuy looked into the azure eyes, confusion in his own, "What happened?" he muttered._

_But no answer came from the young woman's lips -- an onslaught of tears followed, though, face mutilated with malevolent drops of morality.  She fell against the bed, arms wrapping around her body in need of support._

_Heero looked at her suspiciously, was she faking? He sat down on the bed next to her, his usual indifferent heart feeling an uncertain sense of empathy.  He chanced a hand on her shoulder, just a small gesture that took so much debating in his mind that he eventually gave way to letting her rest her cheek against his broad chest._

_She sat like that for some time -- her essence torn to shreds in the demanding society of life she called her home.  But she wouldn't let go; she clung to his strong body, her only firm stance in the perilous world that caused her mind so much pain._

_Finally Relena seemed to doze, her limbs drooping in surrender to the necessity for sleep.  He watched her for a few seconds before placing her petite body under a mass of blankets and walking to the door.  Just before he left he risked a glance in her direction, a puzzled expression making its way onto his face.  What was truly wrong with her?_


End file.
